on today’s episode of “gosh, you’re a terrible parent”

#1: I’m getting ready to load at GMR. The casting director steps out to direct guests to me with a horrified look on his face. The first family (mom, dad, two kids) walks out and Mom wipes something off her hand into the trash can. I ask “how many?” Daughter barfs half in the trash can and half in the floor. Mom says “four,” takes Daughter by the hand, and tries to keep walking forward. I say no. Turns out Daughter barfed in Mom’s hand in preshow, and that’s what Mom was wiping into the trash can.

#2: I’m waiting for the cue to load a party with an ECV (parents, two kids, and grandma) when I realize that Mom has pulled down the toddler’s pants and is preparing to change his diaper on the (carpeted) floor of the preshow. I tell her no, there’s a bathroom outside, take care of him and when you come back go to the fastpass entrance and you can all ride together. Mom pulls up the toddler’s pants and is like “whatever.” Shocked, I asked her if she was going to take him to the bathroom to change his crapped-out diaper. “No.” I tell her it’s a 22 minute ride. “Okay.” GAH. By then it was too late to load them for that set, so they had to wait, and Dad convinced Mom to take the poor shitted kid to the bathroom.

#3: So I got pulled (and extended) at Star Tours later in the day, and a dad decided he had waited far too long. (He hadn’t. It was a walk on. Literally he was just waiting for the gate agent to launch the current flight and come back out to start loading.) He tried to cut to the front of the line and was sent back to the end and told to wait. He looks into the cabin where the gate agent is preparing to launch and sees two empty seats. He then JUMPS THE RAILING with his daughter in tow and is shocked when not only is he not allowed to ride, but he and his daughter are escorted out to have a lovely chat with security.

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