- aries: you beautiful spinster
- taurus: you beautiful, rule-breaking moth
- gemini: you cunning, pliable, chestnut-haired sunfish
- cancer: you beautiful, naïve, sophisticated newborn baby
- leo: beautiful unicorn nurse
- virgo: you devious bastard
- libra: you are the most beautiful glowing sun goddess ever
- scorpio: you poetic, noble land-mermaid
- sagittarius: you are a beautiful, talented, brilliant, powerful musk-ox
- capricorn: you tricky minx
- aquarius: you perfect sunflower
- pisces: you beautiful tropical fish